time.
Hello world. I'm back!
I apologize for the looong silence. Things have been...it's been a roller coaster ride. In a way, everything relates to one another. I've been in school but lagging...being unproductive...it's not the usual me. Let's just say that the spring semester wasn't what I had expected. Forget the goals i was determined to achieve...I continued to postpone and procrastinate.
Then...there was the last month of the semester when I met "him". I couldn't have been happier. It was obvious too. Everyone had seen it in my eyes...except him. Who knows? maybe he did see it..but he sure did take it much more lightly than I did.
It seemed like it meant nothing to him. It seemed like what he gave me was what he did on a daily basis. How I felt never occurred to him.
summer slowly creep-ed up...and without any realization, he was leaving soon. While he was passionately conversing and fantasizing about his future goals and leaving, I continued to melt like a Popsicle in the summer heat. It didn't make any sense to me that I could fall for someone that i had only known for almost 2 months...but it did.
Is there a time limit or length for being able to fall in "L" with someone? It's quality not quantity right? *sigh*
However, I don't blame him. All of it sorta-kinda leads back to me. My own fantasies began to run uncontrollably...they tend to run automatically when it's in "that" mode. and it is rare for me take full control of how I'm feeling. I was going head over heals. I had it bad. Wait...did i just use have in past tense? hmm...guess i am gradually getting over it. but That's what happened. Aside from procrastinating....i had fallen in "love". love....whatever that is.
my friends called it infatuation. I'm infatuated...i've caused myself to see an illusion of the guy i liked as something i breathed day in and out...he gave me false hope. regardless of the length, i yearned for his presence. In my opinion, it's completely humane thing to do. Biologically and psychologically, we as humans want what we can't have. Was I going through that stage or was i really wanting him? I don't know. I don't think anyone knows not even scientists. Not even the great Shakespeare of Romeo and Juliet. They was young when they fell in love. What do they know of love? Everyone has different definition of love. That's what makes love....love.
changing topic...
Friends...I wouldn't have been able to conquer such obstacle without them. I was melting and they gave me hope again. They cheered me up and comforted me. They stayed with me through thick and thin. I am able to stand once again on my two feet.
Going completely off topic....(sorta)...because of them(my friends), i was able to focus on my Test. My JEPET.
I think I'll end it here for now. I wrote enough. i wish i could write more in detail but that would just embarrass me.
Goodnight world.
Tomorrow's a new day! make it a good one!
I apologize for the looong silence. Things have been...it's been a roller coaster ride. In a way, everything relates to one another. I've been in school but lagging...being unproductive...it's not the usual me. Let's just say that the spring semester wasn't what I had expected. Forget the goals i was determined to achieve...I continued to postpone and procrastinate.
Then...there was the last month of the semester when I met "him". I couldn't have been happier. It was obvious too. Everyone had seen it in my eyes...except him. Who knows? maybe he did see it..but he sure did take it much more lightly than I did.
It seemed like it meant nothing to him. It seemed like what he gave me was what he did on a daily basis. How I felt never occurred to him.
summer slowly creep-ed up...and without any realization, he was leaving soon. While he was passionately conversing and fantasizing about his future goals and leaving, I continued to melt like a Popsicle in the summer heat. It didn't make any sense to me that I could fall for someone that i had only known for almost 2 months...but it did.
Is there a time limit or length for being able to fall in "L" with someone? It's quality not quantity right? *sigh*
However, I don't blame him. All of it sorta-kinda leads back to me. My own fantasies began to run uncontrollably...they tend to run automatically when it's in "that" mode. and it is rare for me take full control of how I'm feeling. I was going head over heals. I had it bad. Wait...did i just use have in past tense? hmm...guess i am gradually getting over it. but That's what happened. Aside from procrastinating....i had fallen in "love". love....whatever that is.
my friends called it infatuation. I'm infatuated...i've caused myself to see an illusion of the guy i liked as something i breathed day in and out...he gave me false hope. regardless of the length, i yearned for his presence. In my opinion, it's completely humane thing to do. Biologically and psychologically, we as humans want what we can't have. Was I going through that stage or was i really wanting him? I don't know. I don't think anyone knows not even scientists. Not even the great Shakespeare of Romeo and Juliet. They was young when they fell in love. What do they know of love? Everyone has different definition of love. That's what makes love....love.
changing topic...
Friends...I wouldn't have been able to conquer such obstacle without them. I was melting and they gave me hope again. They cheered me up and comforted me. They stayed with me through thick and thin. I am able to stand once again on my two feet.
Going completely off topic....(sorta)...because of them(my friends), i was able to focus on my Test. My JEPET.
I think I'll end it here for now. I wrote enough. i wish i could write more in detail but that would just embarrass me.
Goodnight world.
Tomorrow's a new day! make it a good one!
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